Friday, March 23, 2007

Ka Huna!

Mr Moi organised for me to be pampered yesterday.

He booked me into a Ka Huna massage, and a caviar pedicure (and no, I didn't get to eat any).

Now, I've had three previous full body massages. Lots of strategically placed towels, and the presence of undies is the norm. My comfort zone exists within these parameters.

I walked into the treatment room yesterday and was greeted by my masseuse. She was a very sturdy looking polynesian woman, who was about 150cms tall. For you imperialists out there, this means that she was short.

First thing, she asked me if I've ever had a Ka Huna massage before. I told her no.

She then proceeded to tell me that I have to leave the comfort of my undies, there are no sheets on the massage bed, and she uses no towels to cover me.

"Ka Huna massage is very beautiful and flowing," she said. "It's a very flowing massage."

Okay, I didn't really know what she meant. But considering Mr Moi booked me into this one, and I miss him so much (oh, did I mention he's left behind in Kyiv?), I couldn't deviate from his plans.

So I dropped the undies and got onto the table.

And for the next half hour, I was repeatedly massaged from head to foot in one sweeping motion, over and over again. It really was great.

I did, however, struggle with all my might to actually remain on the table, which resembled a very nice smelling oil slick. Without the dying seagulls and penguins. Just one beached whale (moi).

Then I had to roll over and lay on my back and get the same treatment on my, erm, front.

Very interesting indeed. Let's just say Ka Huna isn't for the faint hearted...

16 comments:

Karmyn said...

Okay - the back portion I could handle no problem. It sounds VERY relaxing...but the entire front? yai yai yai - I would be quite uncomfortable with that. (too modest for my own good)

theotherbear said...

You reminded me of when I was in Thailand and had a Thai Massage. When I was done and my husband asked me how it was I told him not to get one. "No good?", he asked, surprised. "Nope, very good. A little too goo. Kind of erotic. A woman can hide these things but there's no way a man could!"

However, I'm with karmyn. I would be very uncomfortable with the front massage!

theotherbear said...

Erm, I meant good not goo. Really, it was not that messy...

Beccy said...

I'm with the others, the back sounds fantastic but the front would be a no no.

No said...

so...if you don't eat the caviar...what, um, do you do with it?

Vicki said...

When shew as working on the front, I would have giggled and giggled and giggled.

Or I could have said, "Please do that again."

What a great husband.. does he teach classes?

Claudia said...

ooh, I could so use a good massage...I'll live vicariously through you for now.

Melissa said...

I probably would have had a panic attack or something. I'm so good at relaxing.

willowtree said...

Are you sure it wasn't the other kind of massage parlour?

Leann said...

yicks you have guts.me I wouldnt have been able to do it.Lord knows I dont even go in a swim suit to the beach anymore.got sick of animal lovers coming along and trying to save the whale by pushing her back in the sea if you get my drift!
I dont even let me see me in my undies.too frighting.have a great weekend.

zandria said...

Oh, man! You're more woman than I am. I would be way self-conscious. :)

ChrisB said...

I've only had massages where the towels are strategically placed but it might be worth the embarassment for the wonderful relaxed feeling.

Pamela said...

I think I'll just go to the car wash ... with a hot wax for a finish

samantha louise said...

please dont' tell me she...

Wes said...

My wife would have loved that kind of massage, but then again, she loves any kind of massage! Sounds fantastic.

Little Miss Moi said...

Dear karmyn. Seriously, even if you didn't want to relax, the massage is so relaxing, that you have to relax! Does that make sense?


Dear theotherbear. Hahaha I was afraid Thai massages would be like that so we kept clear. We did get one in Laos though, and it was at the red cross so we thought it would be safe, which it was... Hahah on the goo too. Sounded good.


Dear beccy. Well, she was a short 60 year old and a bit chubby, so it wasn't too hard to relax. I figured she'd seen it all...


Dear no. They put it on your feet! Waste of good caviar if you ask me.


Dear vicki. Guess what. It was my mum who got onto my husband and nagged him to do it. I'll lend you my nagging mum, or get HER to teach in-laws classes.


Dear claudia. Don't live vicariously. Do it! Although I would be a bit chicken to do it in California where everyone's gorgeous.


Dear melissa. This lady was good. You couldn't help but relax.


Dear willow. If it was, then I'm not good a picking up on nuances.


Dear leann. I would much rather expose my body to one person behind closed doors than put on my togs and go to the beach! This is easier than that, trust me.


Dear Zandria. You should make a ka huna or a full body massage a late addition to your list of things to do! Totally worth it.


Dear chrisb. Well, to be honest, if I hadn't had the strategically placed towel massages a couple of times, I probably couldn't have hacked this. You sound like you're ready to graduate to ka huna!


Dear pamela. hahah you make me laugh! it would probably be a lot cheaper too.


Dear samantha louise. O-K! I won't tell you that she accidentally....


Dear wes. Sorry we didn't get to catch up while in Bris. But I was booked up every second (mostly by my two wonderful friends giving my birthday treats at restaurants and bars). Anyhoo. Marriott. Dome Retreat. A couple of hundred bucks. Birthday. Wife. Book it. :o)